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Drunk, a tweeker and a pot head are walking together when they come upon a huge wall with a large, locked gate in the middle...

via: Anti Joke
*When you get her to your place* I'm just going to be honest. I've been on the FBI's most wanted list for quite some time...

via: Anti-Pickup Line
On the Vauxhall vectra: it's a cure for ADD, any child with would fall asleep in 3 minutes flat

via: Clarksonisms

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