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A mushroom walks into a bar, the bartender says, "We don't serve your kind." the mushroom asked why, the Bartender said, "Because your under aged"

via: Anti Joke
-If I could rearrange the alphabet... that would be nice..

via: Anti-Pickup Line
[on his own driving test]

- I didn't see it as a driving test so much as a confirmation of my excelence.

via: Clarksonisms

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