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why didnt you take a shower?
because my house burnt down

via: Anti Joke
Him - Would you like to dance?
Her - NO!
Him - I'm sorry. I think you misunderstood me. I said, "You look fat in...

via: Anti-Pickup Line
You aren't allowed to have a party, you aren't allowed to have music, you aren't allowed to play ball games, you aren't allowed to have...

via: Clarksonisms

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